I am processing emotions ... and reality ... and ethereal fears with such wild abandon that I can barely make sense of it. A friend told me to journal it out. That makes sense but the act of writing usually has so much baggage for me that is rooted in process such as spelling or sentence structure I usually loose inertia. Any previous attempt in my life has proven that, be-it journal, blog, or sketchbook. I also have a bad tendency to worry about someone seeing this at some point. But, if I am speaking the truth and about myself then it cannot be misconstrued as detrimental to others, right? Whatever tool I DO end up using, there is the definite need to process - and with more speed and clarity than is presently happening.
Don't misunderstand this post. I am not sick again or in some kind of traumatic spin - I just am in transition and need to decide on and act on the question, "who am I and who do I want to be tomorrow?" I feel like a 12 year old again.